This is always a good question, especially at young age, does it change your life ? will it effect alot of things? what will people think of me? i am disabled?
Many thoughts went through my mind when I started Dialysis in July 2016. I can say one thing for sure you get used to it but you never do, if that make sense.
I have to do dialysis every night / every day for 8 hours. I sleep not all 8 hours that’s something i have to accept at times.
Does dialysis of end stage kidney failure make you feel depressed, yes it it can have you mood up and down, its okay to have that. I sometimes feel frustrated and alone that i am alone in this journey of mine.
I learnt more than I could ever learn in life, I learnt love and humble and I also beleive in god and I am very grateful for his energy he has given me. I know something is keeping me going, its hard to explain to anyone. I hope that in these writing of blogs I can help with so much positive and negative but also , how to stay ahead and don;t let it all get you down.
It changed part of my life dialysis. There is safety procedures we have to follow , cleaning, setting up the machine every day and keeping our house/room very clean, so important in this otherwise you can easily get infection and I been told its not nice.
I know people say you cannot enjoy dialysis, but my best friend is my Dialysis machine, I sometimes even laugh and smile at it, but I also treat it like a baby as it’s keeping me alive and doing the work my kidney cannot do but i also have to remember its a support machine not a life saving machine.
There is 2 types of dialysis Hemo and PD , I do PD as its gives little bit more freedom to my life. it allows me to do certain things that I enjoy.
I cannot go into swimming pools and I only have sponge bath, I have forgotten what a shower feels like. I could have shower but its risky of getting infection, so I am scared. (but that does not mean you don’t do it, each patient will have different view and feeling)
Its small things that I have to give up for me to be sitting here typing and listening to in hindiusm Harinaaam.
There at times I feel very down and sad inside and tears in my eyes, but I hide it away from people. I dont want people to remember this way, I want people to remember that something I could leave behind in life if i my time comes. I did something for the future generation to come be it Hindu, Muslim, Sikh, Christian, Buddhishm, what ever you are or believe. I want to give back to this world and country, as I am debted to this place in my life.
I always go and push myself and do things, sometimes even hospital are suprised how do i work , how do i travel or do things so much. I said mind over matter at times and let the bigger doctor worry about that part.
I think when you in my situation support around does help alot. you are going to have more than 3 or 4 days of struggle and at times feeling I dont want to do this dialysis or feeling low in energy. Its okay to ask for help we are humans end of the day.
Is there much support for Dialysis patient, the answer is yes from what I have. Can the government do more for us , I think it needs to be much more support.
One thing for sure apply for PIP – you will get help in money to help you. Dialysis can tire our legs and makes weak.
One thing I learn and always learning about dialysis and kidney failure. Just keep going and follow doctors and nurses input. Also we have to be strong and our willpower. I know its a long waiting game for a transplant and its like a lottery. I say to you in UK is it time we discussed why after we donate we cannot donate our organs for other people use. Is it really to do with out religion or is it to do with attachment and death fear?
https://www.organdonation.nhs.uk/about-donation/what-does-my-religion-say/hinduism/
Again its individual belief, so I will not go too deep into this as each person believes in different things.
life of Dialysis 